Personal boundaries are essential to managing unnecessary stress and knowing and understanding what our personal limits are. They are also a sign of self-respect, and they can help us to nurture healthy relationships with those around us both personally and in the work setting.
Personal boundaries are also fundamental to self-care so that we prioritise time for ourselves to recover and recharge. There can be a tendency in the modern world towards self-sacrifice and even workaholism which can lead us to dismiss our boundaries and sacrifice our wellbeing to please other people.
To set healthy boundaries we need to know where we stand by identifying our physical, emotional and spiritual limits. We need to consider what we can tolerate and accept and what makes us feel uncomfortable and stressed.
So here are my top 3 tips for establishing healthy boundaries…
1.Know your limits
The first step to defining our boundaries is to understand what energises us and what depletes us. So set aside some time to reflect and ask yourself the following questions:
What is causing me unnecessary stress or discomfort in my life right now?
What are my stress triggers?
Who in my life energises me and who in my life drains me?
What areas of my life do I feel exhausted by?
What helps me to feel inspired and motivated?
2. Avoid being a workaholic
Learning to switch off from work can be challenging and the addictive nature of being a workaholic can be a difficult habit to break. If you are prone to being a workaholic without limits (especially when working from home) here are a few tips:
· Set precise working hours and schedule proper breaks and be really disciplined about sticking to these
· If you work from home, then doing a fake commute to and from work by walking around the block at the beginning and end of each day can be very helpful
· Avoid checking phones for work messages when you are with family and friends
· Communicate to colleagues that you are not available during certain times
· Define a space that is only for work
· When you close your laptop, mentally allow yourself to “clock out” for the day by turning your laptop OFF and avoid checking emails before you go to bed
· Take a technoloholiday as often as you can and set aside tech free time
· Keep technology out of the bedroom wherever possible
3. Communicate your boundaries
We may well set boundaries in our minds without openly sharing them with other people. If we don’t clearly communicate to others where we have drawn the line, how will people understand if they have overstepped our boundaries.
The more precisely and confidently we can communicate our boundaries, the easier it will be to maintain them. In many ways boundaries are like the “rules” of a relationship and when they are communicated well it will be much easier for other people to respect our boundaries. In turn it can also help to appreciate other people’s
Summary
Remember boundaries are sign of self-respect and it is perfectly human, normal and acceptable to set healthy boundaries. Please do join Liggy’s monthly newsletter to explore an assortment of complimentary resources
About the Author
Liggy Webb is an award-winning and best-selling author, presenter, and international consultant. She is also the founding director of LWL, an international consortium of behavioural skills specialists. Liggy is recognised as a thought leader on human resilience and wellbeing, working with a wide range of global organisations across the sector.